Marriage
Introduction:
Dr. Rajendra Prasad, India’s first President and a champion of social reform, led a remarkable life despite the regressive practice of child marriage affecting his early years. His marriage, arranged when he was just thirteen, defied social norms. This article explores the journey of Dr. Rajendra Prasad’s marriage, the financial challenges his family faced, and the customs that governed his early married life.
Summary:
At the age of thirteen, during a summer visit to Zeradei, Dr. Rajendra Prasad’s life took an unexpected turn. His father, along with a Mukhtiar from Arrah and a lawyer from Ballia, arranged for his marriage to a girl even younger than him. The engagement ceremony, known as the Tilak, marked the formal agreement between the two families. The bride’s family provided clothes, utensils, and a substantial sum of Rs. 2000, which was a significant amount at the time. Despite financial difficulties, Dr. Prasad’s father spared no expense, prioritizing honor above all else.
The wedding procession featured horses and elephants, symbols of grandeur. However, due to financial constraints, Dr. Prasad’s family could only afford one elephant and a few horses. As the procession traveled to the wedding venue in Dalan-Chapra, they faced challenges from the wind, which disrupted the canopy on Dr. Prasad’s palki (a palanquin-like carriage). They reached the Sarju river, where the elephant, unwilling to swim, had to be tied to a boat. Eventually, additional elephants were secured from another procession, saving the day. Despite these hurdles, they arrived at their destination late in the evening.
The tiring two-day journey left young Dr. Prasad exhausted, and he fell asleep in the palki upon arrival. He struggled to stay awake during the wedding rituals due to his fatigue. The author recalls that, at the time, he didn’t grasp the significance of the marriage ceremony. The customs and rituals were largely conducted without his involvement, following the guidance of the priest and female family members. One custom involved the bride staying in seclusion, with communication permitted only through maids. The strict practice of Purdah, which meant veiling and seclusion, was observed. Over time, these stringent rules were relaxed.
Question and Answer
1. How was the author’s marriage arranged?
Answer: The author’s marriage was arranged when he was just thirteen years old. His father, along with a Mukhtiar and a lawyer, asked him a few questions, and the marriage proposal was finalized.
2. What is the purpose of the Tilak ritual, as described in the passage?
Answer: The Tilak ritual serves as a formal agreement between the groom and the bride’s father, binding both sides to conduct the marriage ceremony later. It involves the exchange of gifts, with the bride’s side providing gifts matched in value by the groom’s side for the wedding expenses.
3. How would you describe the financial situation of the author’s family, and did it impact the grandeur of the author’s wedding?
Answer: The author’s family was facing financial difficulties due to various factors such as family deaths, a decline in income from zamindari, legal expenses, and educational costs. Despite these challenges, the author’s father chose to conduct the wedding in a grand manner, including giving substantial gold ornaments to the bride.
4. How does the author depict his marriage procession?
Answer: The author recalls his marriage procession with a sense of bemusement. Although it was intended to be a grand event, covering a distance of 40 miles, it did not live up to expectations. The canopy on the author’s palki was dislodged by the wind, and the elephant meant to accompany the procession initially refused to cooperate. Despite these hiccups, the procession’s mood was lifted by the lavish array of gifts.
5. Why was the author’s father dissatisfied, and how was his desire fulfilled?
Answer: The author’s father had hoped for a procession with multiple elephants and horses, but the only elephant available initially refused to proceed. This disappointment reminded him of his own grand wedding procession, which had featured numerous elephants and horses. Fortunately, the author’s party encountered a group of elephants returning from another procession and was able to hire them, which greatly pleased the author’s father.
6. What are the author’s reflections on his marriage?
Answer: The author contemplatively describes how he was thrust into his marriage without any active role to play. He felt like a pawn in a game where others controlled his destiny.
7. How does the author explain the ritual of Duragman?
Answer: Duragman refers to the ceremonial arrival of the young daughter-in-law to her husband’s home, which occurs a few days after the wedding.
8. How does the author portray the custom of purdah observed by his sister-in-law?
Answer: The author vividly depicts the purdah custom, which involved the strict seclusion of the new daughter-in-law in her new home. She had no freedom to move, speak, or interact with anyone, and the same restrictions applied to all male members. Even when she needed to use the restroom, her view had to be obscured by hanging bed sheets around her, and she could only communicate through her two maids.
9. How old was Dr. Rajendra Prasad when his marriage was arranged?
Answer: Dr. Rajendra Prasad was thirteen years old when his marriage was arranged.
10. Who were the key parties involved in finalizing Dr. Prasad’s marriage?
Answer: The key parties involved in finalizing Dr. Prasad’s marriage were his father, a Mukhtiar from Arrah, and a lawyer from Ballia.
11. What was the significance of the Tilak ceremony in the marriage process?
Answer: The Tilak ceremony marked the formal agreement between the two families and signified the betrothal of the bride and groom.
12. What financial challenges did Dr. Prasad’s family face during the wedding preparations?
Answer: Dr. Prasad’s family was facing financial difficulties due to various factors, including deaths in the family, a decrease in zamindari income, education expenses, and legal bills.
13. How did Dr. Prasad’s father react to the financial constraints in organizing the wedding?
Answer: Despite financial constraints, Dr. Prasad’s father prioritized honor and spent lavishly on the wedding, including providing substantial gold ornaments to the bride.
14. What animals were traditionally part of wedding processions, and why were they important?
Answer: Horses and elephants were traditionally part of wedding processions, symbolizing grandeur and significance. They indicated the grandness of the event.
15. What challenges did the wedding procession face during its journey?
Answer: The wedding procession faced challenges from strong winds that disrupted the canopy of Dr. Prasad’s palki. Additionally, the elephant initially refused to swim across the river.
16. How did the wedding procession resolve the issue of the elephant’s refusal to swim?
Answer: The procession managed to secure additional elephants from another passing procession, resolving the issue of the reluctant elephant.
17. Why did Dr. Prasad fall asleep upon arriving at the bride’s place?
Answer: Dr. Prasad was exhausted from the two-day journey and fell asleep upon arriving at the bride’s place.
18. How does the author describe his understanding of the marriage ceremony at the time?
Answer: The author admits that, at the time, he didn’t fully grasp the significance of the marriage ceremony.
19. What was the custom of Duragman, and when did it occur?
Answer: Duragman was the ceremonial arrival of the young daughter-in-law to her husband’s home, which took place a few days after the marriage.
20. What was the custom of Purdah, and how did it affect the newlywed bride?
Answer: Purdah was the practice of strict seclusion of the newlywed bride, limiting her interactions and movement. She could communicate only through maids.
21. How were the rules of Purdah eventually relaxed?
Answer: Over time, the strict rules of Purdah were relaxed, allowing more freedom and interaction for the bride.
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